Posted in Books

Why I am NOT excited about Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

DISCLAIMER: This is NOT a review. It’s me talking about my sense of foreboding regarding this book-script. Or script book. Whatever.

WARNING: Long article ahead.

Also the ” /*(text)*/ stand for “comments” as they are known in the language of programming. They aren’t a part of the main text but for the readers to get a better understanding of the programmer (in this case, the author’s) logic/train of thought while writing a program (read: article). Enjoy.

Credit: http://www.slideshare.net

This image began my more-than-a-decade long romance with the Harry Potter series. I watched the first four movies before reading the books (There were books? More of them? What?) and I can’t say that there is any other series that has captured my heart better than this one. I’m an ardent Potterhead, and I pride myself on being the only person I know who knows the name of the gamekeeper during Molly Weasley’s term at school by coming across that one insignificant line in the books. I adore this series so much that you’ll find me incredulous to the point of hysteria when someone comes up to me and tells me that they “don’t like Harry Potter”.

“Don’t like Harry Potter”, psh, what does that even mean? “Don’t like Harry Potter…”, oh yeah? Then you probably don’t like puppies and cookies and Beyoncè with that bad taste of yours! Just kidding; it’s not my place to tell you which book series to like and which not to.

/*I understand that because I read the second book of the Power of Five series by Anthony Horowitz and I literally fell asleep while doing so. As a result I somehow never managed find myself reading another one of those books and I raise a lot of eyebrows when I say that I’m not fond of the series*/

Let me start by saying that the seven HP books were truly phenomenal and I’m so glad that I own a copy of each of them! I have re-read the entire series over 20 times. Not exaggerating.

That these heavenly creations of J.K Rowling would ever bore or displease me-unthinkable! In fact, when I hadn’t yet seen the Order of the Phoenix or even heard about it, I had made up my mind to write the fifth Harry Potter book and I actually wrote a couple of pages before I realised I didn’t have any ideas for Harry’s “new great adventures at Hogwarts!”

And yes, that’s an actual line from the page.

So why, do you ask, do I lack any enthusiasm regarding The Cursed Child? The answer’s simple: the story has already been closed. Now read patiently.

Note: I’ve grown up as a Potterhead and nothing would ever induce me to “hate on” my family that is the HP fandom. All these opinions are mine only and do note that I have NOT read this book, else this article would be called “Why I don’t like The Cursed Child.”. I’m simply talking about my sense of foreboding regarding this…”book”. 

As someone who used to write a lot of stories (I even once wrote 30 chapters of a very childish Halloween thriller novel that my mum has the manuscript of somewhere) and as someone who has a lot of friends who are authors on Wattpad, I do get it when an author feels their story has to take a certain direction, or when an author decides that their story is simply done.

Now don’t get me wrong- I also perfectly understand the feelings of indignation when a much loved story stops prematurely from the reader’s point of view, or when they don’t agree with something the author wrote because everything seems so unprecedented and out-of-character-and-out-of-the-blue.

However, because they’re the ones giving us this beautiful tale; the least we can do is to respect the author’s choices and decisions. Therefore, I quite understand it when an author says that a story is done. Even if I don’t feel that way as a reader.

Credit: s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com

/*Again, I love Harry Potter to bits. You see this picture  ^ over there? That was me after Deathly Hallows.*/

Some readers have a difficult time accepting that a gobsmacking story had ended and take a lot of time to get over it. But we do it, nevertheless, because life has to move on. That’s the point of the story of the Resurrection Stone, innit? To teach us that we’ve got to move on because living in the past isn’t good. Then why, JoRow, did you not take that advice yourself?

The series has ended! There’s nothing more that is to be said about the Triumphant Trio. All was well. When I put down The Deathly Hallows, I wasn’t as upset as I was content. I was simply happy that the story had ended in the perfect way and I could forever imagine the lives of my three favourite people and feel free to speculate about what happened to them. It was, as some authors would say, ‘done’. And I had accepted that. I was happy.

Then, I heard about “The Cursed Child” and I wondered-what was the premise of this story? The most evil villain of their time was dust and things were looking so good! How could this possibly happen? Who cursed the child? My first though was that this reminded me of  an annoying Indian soap opera -with it being dragged on despite no real reason for the extension. I liked Hermione, Ron and Harry a LOT. Loved their friends and family. I practically worshipped JK for the magical world she created. I loved reading about their adventures. But I’m not really interested in reading about their children. That’s just my opinion.

I mean, there’s a good series, and then there are authors who milk it for all it’s worth and end up with something shrivelled up and tasteless.

Credit: http://blog.admissions.berkeley.edu/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/GIFS-No-way.gif

This is perhaps the first time that a reader has said “Okay, that’s enough”, but the author has taken it further. Rowling is the queen of foreshadowing and elaborate plots with a lot of forethought. Yet, she never hinted that anything of this sort might happen. If I was Blue, I would be upset because I had no clues. Okay, bad joke.

I haven’t even read the book, so I don’t feel too great about trashing it, but I don’t think it’s going to be that great. My friends are going gaga over it, though.

Let’s start off by saying a collaboration on a story that has no reason to exist or anything is not a great idea. Even if the story is just average, it wouldn’t read well for someone used to J.K’s script, because she knows the characters the best and she knows exactly what they would, and wouldn’t do, how they would do it, what they would say, and so on.

Writing style is a big thing when it comes to books and anyone who isn’t the original author is going to come up with something that will definitely sound out of place.  Not that I have anything against the other writers-I just think that  heterogeneity in something like the script of a Harry Potter book, though a fresh breath of air, may not necessarily be a welcome one.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<SPOILER ALERT>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Though I haven’t read it yet, I didn’t mind hearing a couple of spoilers from my friends. This is the first time I’ve cared so less about a book that knowing spoilers wouldn’t bother me. Proof that I’m not excited about it at all.

HEAD DOWN TO THE END OF SPOILER LINE IF YOU DON’T WANT TO READ THIS. Again, this is NOT A REVIEW, I haven’t read it yet.

Though it may have been written fabulously (I don’t know), I think some things about this book are super out of character.

Hermione is now the Minister for Magic. When I heard about that, I just felt the need to point out that she hated the Ministry and always wished to “take the SPEW further” and do something worthwhile. Now she’s stuck at a desk job and appearing out of chimneys to talk to David Cameron? {The Cameron part isn’t canon but I think it would’ve been funny if it was} I don’t think so.

And..the big one: Voldy has a kid named Delphi.

Credit: 38.media.tumblr.com

What? He has always shown to be averse to humans, much less the bonds of human  relationships. He never regarded Bellatrix as anything other than a highly loyal and faithful servant. If she had to give birth to a kid, there would have had to be some indication of it in book 6 or 7.

How is it that the Dark Lord has a child and nobody even knows about it? He didn’t love. He didn’t have friends. I demand an explanation for this. (This may also be a wonderful time to mention that she had a husband who was alive at the time her child was supposed to have been born. Why did he not flip out?)

And can someone convince me about how  Bellatrix walked around for nine months looking perfectly slim and babyless with absolutely NO signs of morning sickness or anything for the Death Eaters to have suspected that she was carrying a child? Plus, I don’t understand how Voldemort even decided to have one. He had no body. No human body. He was a freakin’ monster!

Interestingly enough, I’m told his daughter has a nose.

Also, Cedric’s father has no chill.

EVEN BIGGER SPOILER BELOW. DO NOT READ IF NOT INTERESTED.

He decides to ask Harry to use a Time Turner to get his son back. That’s not the sort of favour you ask someone! Then everybody could get everyone back to life and the universe would be a mess. Move. On. I mean, there are some things that are best left in the past. No magic can raise the dead and let them be exactly the same-and whole-again. Worse still? Nah, no more spoilers.

Credit:data.whicdn.com

Note that I haven’t included Albus’s dysfunctional relationship with Harry, because it’s quite possible for a child to be frustrated about living in his father’s shadow.

And, I believe that there is no mention of George or Teddy Lupin. Disappointing- to say the least.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<END OF SPOILER>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Now, as I have pointed out, there are a lot of people being way out of character, plot points that make no sense, and important people kept away from the limelight. I wasn’t so happy with the idea of this book even before I came across these spoilers, but I’m less eager to read it now.

Tell me if this what you feel too: I don’t think I’d be able to connect with the characters that much.  Harry’s children were a part of the series for just one chapter. With the original books, we had plenty of time to get to know the main characters and grow up with them. We watched them think, make stupid decisions, fall in and out of love, experience childhood and adulthood, and a million other things besides. Albus is already in his fourth year when the story’s events take place! That. Was. Fast!

Does he like Cockroach Clusters? Does he know about the secret passage to Honeydukes? How did he feel about picking his extra subjects in his third year? Granted, it’s a play, but that doesn’t change anything about how little I know about this little boy, and why that will prevent me from enjoying reading his escapades as much I liked to read about his father.

Lastly, like other stories that come out of nowhere, I think this play might read like fanfiction.

Think about it! Other authors+no real premise for the story+plot points and characters that don’t conform with the original content=FANFICTION. Those who’ve read the spoilers would probably agree.

Credit: media2.giphy.com

All in all, to me it seems like this book has no reason to exist. It wasn’t necessary. I’m glad she has announced that Harry is done, though. At the end of all that, JK knows the series the best and I respect her decision to publish this book and accept the script and all that, but that doesn’t mean I have to agree with it. I’m more upset that everything in The Cursed Child is canon. I know there are proabably more ridiculous plot points out there as part of the book. I’m definitely less than excited about it.

Will I read it? Eventually. Will I buy it? Not unless I really, really like it after I borrow it from a friend and read it. Somehow, I don’t see that happening. This script-book could be something that ruins the entire Potterverse for me.

Also, for some reason, I don’t like the idea of solidifying either of those time periods in the Potterverse with definite events because it’s simply best left to our own imagination. Like I always say (I just made up my own saying): “Too many books leave the readers loth”.

/*Aha. I have my own quote now. Copyrighted to moi. Ha. Take that, tumblr.*/

That being said, I can only hope it all makes sense somehow. Like I said about Pokèmon Go, as a fan, (a Potterhead for life) I can only desperately hope that this script-book isn’t as bad as it sounds. I’m going to borrow it soon. Wish me luck.

Do you agree? Have you read the book? Let me know your thoughts!

Alpha ❤︎

PS: Sending my love out to all Potterheads; I’m not against this book but I’m very sceptical that it’ll live up to the Harry Potter glory the way it ought to. If you’re having serious doubts about that, read the book and then let me know.

 

 

Advertisements

Author:

Entrusted with running The Commonplace Chronicles. Loves dogs, ice creams and pizzas. Big, big Potterhead and proud Hufflepuff. Wants to rule the world (See, we can be ambitious!)...or maybe just a big library. (Ravenclaws aren't the only people who like reading? Look at Hermione, for Merlin's sake!) Likes making new friends and meeting Pokémon. Heil Humdrum. Alpha Out.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s